“When people show you who they are, believe them.” … When a person let’s you know … they say, “I told you I was unkind. So now why are you angry?” – Maya Angelou

I suppose Maya Angelou’s question is a rhetorical one, but I’m going to answer it anyway, because God knows I’ve spent countless hours over decades trying to understand how twisted relationships happen.

“Why don’t you believe them the first time they show you, or tell you, who they are?”

Because…

• You very much want them to be better than they are at any given point in time.
• You are optimistic they can be.
• You are committed to the relationship, and don’t give up on your commitments that easily.
• You aren’t ready to give up on what COULD be, if only some crucial corrections are made.
• You know this person CAN be good, you’ve seen them act…